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face in my left arm pit area, thus getting his blood all over my left sleeve and collar. Now he’s just trying to get away from me. Not wanting to kill the guy, I let him go. He gets up and falls back, distancing himself from me. Blood all over his face and body, and his blood on my shirt and fists…

The “Iceman": “Fuck this! I’m out of here!”

And he looks at me to see if I’m going to attack him. I’m a nice guy, and am in much more control of myself than I was when I was in high school. I maintain eye contact…

Me: “You just got rocked. Walk away.”

And he starts walking away. Guy just got his ass whooped in front of his girlfriend. I don’t have as much as a scratch or bruise on me. Well, actually, I think he kicked me in my nuts, because I get up with my dick hurting like hell. My guess? He probably thought hitting me in my nuts would put me out of commission. His mistake was forgetting the effects of adrenaline and testosterone: it temporarily nullifies pain.

The Peacemaker and The Drunken Russian look at me while smiling…

The Peacemaker: “I need to get you out of here before you get arrested.”

It pays to have friends that look out for you. Let this story be a lesson as to why you don’t try to start shit with people that you don’t know. WATCHING UFC does not make you a fighter. Things are a lot different in the real world. And The “Iceman” learned this lesson the hard way.

We get to The Peacemaker’s. Take a few pictures of the blood. A trophy to be remembered. I can’t drive home and risk getting pulled over with blood all over me. Take off my shirt. Soak it in cold water. What a night.

She Can't Believe It's Not Butter (story) The Drunken Russian is getting dressed…

Me: “You can’t wear that.”

The Drunken Russian: “Why not? It looks good.”

Me: “No it doesn’t. Never wear a darker colored dress shirt under a t-shirt. It just doesn’t look right. Don’t ask me why. I have an eye for things like that.”

The Drunken Russian: “OK, Queer Eye.”

Touché.


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Last-modified: 2021-10-19 (火) 23:39:48 (919d)